Ka Hoku o Hawaii, Volume XXXIV, Number 26, 25 October 1939 — Untitled [ARTICLE+ILLUSTRATION]

Ju!es Carviilho lias quit tnnlng: in on the war n6w§. He says he has hwml $o many ];>>s told over his radio sinee the \vur started that he catches himself doing the sanie laiely. And Jules has always heen a grertt adiuirer of GeOrge Washing_ I fon. Xow tliere*s a real patriot. 1 The worst «nemy of Generai ! Offensive on the Western Front is Generai Mud. liep. "Kowtly" Costa says he hasn"t seen his name Ih this coluuiu for a long time. l?ut "Kowdy" hasirt done anything sensatidhai siru e he eame haek fronl the legislature, except to say that, līke Presīilent Coolidge, lie "does nor ehoose "to run" agaih, whieh is bad news i'or the iady voters since he is the >egislature's most eligible bache!or. He di<l intimate, hovvever, tliat he "might change his mind.'' One of o«r subscribers wants to know if we flet paid for writing this eolumn. No, we a«t overpa«d for it. | Oue of ihe iuce!?t things ahout j Monday iuormng is tliat it makesj snme of us appreciate Saturday; night. | Nationally famous swing band leader says swīng music is dying. ' Judging by the sound it makes «t sure Js. If the Germans waht to success-1 full>' houil) Scotfand they shoiild wait uutil tas colleotion day, That's : wheu the Scots are all out on the streets. DESERT POME NO. 46 Stat(ed on the desert ls road foreman Black; And the last gas station ts twenty miles back. v;ermau planes didnt have very good success hombmg Scotlaud, They found it a prctty nght little >ou»try. 1939 simiie: As comp!ete!y obiiterated as Poiand, BULL,ETtN

"i£ I w<?re Presideut I'd soon put i a stop to this war talk." LĪFE'S DARKEST v MOMENT Wh«n you find the tax offic« ha« grabbed four y<ars' poli t4* * out of your county pay eheek. N*»«?ded !siVēntiou: A umehilK' that wiU suj>ji!y y,»u wiUi i, t > waler whih> ycu .ii>> sāhedl>eaauts Ht tbe m«Uuee. SOURPUSS SAM SAYS; j

"Some folks around | i h <ere wMi spcnd a delfar : a d«»y at the druflstof~c '

fur>cT! countera just to g!ve th« lmpre»»]on ti*Ky ar« maktng plenty of money,*' līave you t\v;ir>! oni- ulunH th« v |MWr UtU« Hauuikuii Sk-o>uli mlm> diwn'? know how oUI ?tv i»t lne f*ih« u'i;> liuu wl)«u Uis 1» nhliu Ss. |MPOSSIBLE

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their mark these days—ou cars. 1939 fab!e: Onee upon a time there w&s a motorist who deposited $2 bail for traffic vio!ation and actually went to court the next morning. Soiue of those fel!o\vs who liang aioumi the streci coruerti reuiiu<i us ol Samson, noi hecause of theiri strenglh hut because they have the juvvbone of au ass. Wanda Waffleiron has been try- i ing to buy fly-paper so she ean send a letter on the Clipper. J L)irectiiig a swiug baud has ,one j vinue—you don't need to tuue the iustruments. Eddie Fernandez wiii soon be here with his shows — and we dont wa«it to hear any wisecracks abōut bringing ra*n with him. 1 LfMMER-LICK ! Thi>re is a wild hile about Nona, Who wore a bh\ck c!iiffou kimona. i Bnt don"t think for a mlnute \ There's anything ln it— ; That i<?, anyrhīng exoppt Xona. Believe it or not, this town has «w(« business w>omen than any other piaee of its size in the USA # but most of them are always lnto other peop!es' busines«. AT THE WHARF. ILei seller: 'T.uy a fkwer lei for the woman vou lovc." Prospeetive gentleman eustomer: "That. wouldn't be riglit, I'm a nmrried oiau." And then there's the tinotype operator who <fidn*t ask for a bonus when the job was flnished, Hilo's pnhlle' library )m$ a r\>of that !eaks, Well, inayl>e thcroV too niueh dry readlng there atij how, SAD STORV Heave a sad sigh For Qioria Cohen, She drove her c*r Through a safety *one Wh«n folks were passing— A eop saw Gloria Who introduced her To Judge Osorio. in court next day She said, "Awe, shucks, To meet hts honor 'Twas worth two bucks!" The war has created a demaud for ooromi!s Now Is the time to hny īn th!s eohimn.